Fat and Happy?

Annemie Odendaal: Oil & Charcoal
"The Weight of my Mistakes"

I used to think, and believe, that I am fat and happy. Over the past two years, I am embarrassed to say, I have picked up a substantial amount of weight. I just wrote it off to all our travels and love for good food and wine, and never really lost sleep over it. After my sudden divorce however, I just started losing weight spontaneously. I did not put in any effort, and I wasn't in mourning, denying myself of good care and food. No, it just-happened.

That's when I started thinking. Is your weight gain a symptom of something else that might be wrong in your life, something bigger that you might not even be aware of? 

My biggest question after the divorce was "Why did I not see this coming, how could I not have seen how things have changed?" Obviously my sub-conscious was not as unaware of everything as I was. There might be something wrong in your life that you might not even realise or be aware of. You might not be overweight though, it may be something different for you, like an addiction. 

Listen to your heart, it knows what is going on. You can only suppress that erupting volcano inside of you for so long, then it is going to explode in one way or another. So before that happens and destroy you in the process with it, see if you can't soften the blow by being honest with yourself. Be open to what your heart tells you. 

The only way I think I can prevent this from happening to me again, is by re-assessing my life regularly. Sit down and really look at your life. Is what you are hiding or suppressing really worth what you are protecting or gaining? Don't just sweep the small things under a rug. Look at every aspect of your life, and make sure you stay true to yourself, have set goals, and make sure that you are on the right track to accomplish it. 

Be happy. Really happy. Life is just too short to not be truly happy and fulfilled. Live the life you always dreamed you will have. If you don't have it, the good news is that you can always change it! Of course it doesn't need to be as drastic as a divorce, but if you keep the balance in your life, and regain control over whatever is burdening you, your heart will relax and be at peace with you again.

So before you make excuses next time for the little foxes in your life, stand still for a moment and think: Am I really fat and happy?